Who's there? "Um, candy gram." Are you that clever shark? "I'm only a dolphin, ma'am"...

Ha!!! I wish it wasn’t so and that I had more grace than this (I’m much better than I used to be), but I have to confess something! I’ve always hated unexpected visitors at my front door. It’s so……unexpected! Eeeks…who’s there? What do you want? “GO AWAY”, the old grouchy lady exclaimed! No, mostly I tell my children, “shhhhh, hide”. LOL Why does it bother me? Not because I hate people or visitors to the house, I actually love to entertain and spend time with friends and family. But my unexpected visitor phobia comes from a combination of things.

 

First, I dread the morning knock at my door (morning for me is still 11am). My hair is usually still disheveled, I’m probably still in my pj’s, if luck has it I do have a bra on but there are no guarantees, and chances are good that the only make-up I have on is the black streak of left over, crusted on mascara that attacked my face during a good nights sleep. I look a freight! And I pity the foo that has to see me in such a train wreck state. Don’t pity Jim though, he likes that look!

Secondly, a mid-day knock at the door in my neighborhood usually means a sales person. Someone that wants something I don’t have much of: time and cash! And I hate disappointing people but what I hate more is listening to a sales schpeal at my front door, with a strange man I don’t know, with a household full of all my valuables: my children! So, I answer my window at these moments. Sorry dude, what you’re selling I don’t need or can’t afford and I’m not opening my door to no strange man - unless maybe you have chocolates with you. HA!

Thirdly, if it’s a knock at night, I’m even more of a basket case. Again, I love guests, but normally in the evening everyone in the house is either hauling butt to finish their dinner, homework or laundry….or a really good movie. Who wants to be interrupted when time is of the essence? And you know, here’s the real reason (lol)……my house is TRASHED and we‘re all exhausted and crabby. So if my unexpected visitor is someone I know and love, I’m usually so embarrassed of what the day (and a few sloppy children) have left EVERYWHERE. Remember the sock fight post a month or so ago? Well, again…you might find a sock or juice box or underwear in any random spot on any given night if I’m not expecting you. So, I probably won’t open the door then either: unless you can hang out for 15 minutes while I get my act together. Yes, I’m that good…I’ve got a system and can do some masterful cleaning as to not offend your senses! I’ve developed a 15 minute speed cleaning plan of action….of course it helps that I’m a great delegator! Connor, quick: you’re in charge of all paper, pick it all up and make a nice neat pile on the counter. Cameron, find all socks and put them in the laundry room. Parker, dish duty…go! I’ll get the slime off of the table and any toys, food or rocks, leafs, bugs and wildlife I can find….go….time me!

I've become better over this past year, I've tried to make myself plan for the unplanable.  I get up a little earlier in the morning to take a shower, I've tried to keep on top of the major clutter and organize things as to make it easier for the family to put stuff back where they go.  Although, as much as I organize, it only takes a few days of OTHERS to unorganize me....maybe I need to place labels on all shelves with reminders of what goes where: "PLEASE PLACE YOUR UNDERWEAR ON THIS SHELF, THANK YOU".  Really I'm more of a happy go lucky kinda gal; so when I try to become ultra organized the perfectionist in me comes out and it just makes me more stressed when they don't put things back where they belong...it's a catch 22! So I suppose the key is just to tell folks, "Hey, you're welcome over, just please call first....because you never know what you might get....it may not be pretty!" EEKS!  So I guess you can say, I'm still working on my hospitality skills - some are born with it, other's of us have a struggle with it! But I'm determined to expect the unexpected and prepare for the unpreparable from here on out - and of course SMILE the whole day through!  Hugs & love, Kim